God is a Matchmaker by Derek Prince & Ruth Prince

Author:Derek Prince & Ruth Prince [Prince, Derek & Prince, Ruth]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2012-01-03T16:45:03+00:00

The Role of Parents and Pastors

It is natural for parents to be concerned about the mates their children marry. In different cultures and periods of history, parents have expressed this concern in a variety of ways. In some forms of Judaism, the choice of mates was at one time the exclusive responsibility of the parents. This is still true among various Arab and Asiatic peoples today.

To most people in our Western culture, such a practice seems medieval and ridiculously autocratic. But before accepting such a judgment, we should take time to evaluate the results. On this basis, Western culture cannot afford to point a finger at any other system. No other culture in human history has produced so high a proportion of unhappy and broken marriages, with all their inevitable train of evil social consequences.

Is there one specific system for arranging marriages that is superior to all the others? I would be inclined to answer no. There are, however, certain principles that always apply. These can be made to work successfully in various cultures and social systems. Parents may follow these principles on behalf of their children, or children may apply them to their own lives. In either case, the results will depend on the principles that are applied rather than on the persons who apply them.

The basis for success may be summed up in one word: respect. This has three different aspects: respect for God and His

Word; respect for marriage; and respect for human personality. I have dealt with each of these aspects in previous chapters of this book. Where respect of this kind is supplanted by wrong attitudes and motives—such as lust, covetousness, pride, or selfish ambition—there is no system that can produce a successful marriage.

The Bible record indicates a considerable degree of flexibility in the way some of its main characters entered into marriage. Abraham, for instance, accepted responsibility for obtaining a bride for his son Isaac, and sent his servant back to Mesopotamia for this purpose. The servant was given certain stipulations in his choice, but in the last resort he depended on prayer to reveal the woman God had chosen (see Genesis 24:12-14). This accords fully with the principles set forth earlier in this book.

Isaac's two sons, Esau and Jacob, both made their own choice of mates, Esau contrary to the desires of his parents. Jacob followed his parents' directions, but actually made his own choice and negotiated the terms of his two marriages with his uncle Laban. It is significant that the son who accepted his parents' directions was more successful than the one who did not.

In the period of the Judges, Samson made his own choice of a Philistine wife, contrary to his parents' desires. Samson persuaded his parents, however, to make the actual matrimonial arrangements on his behalf. In his choice of a wife, Samson went against both the Law of Moses and his parents' counsel. This set him on a course that led to his ultimate disaster.

Irrespective of any particular system

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